Sunday, May 11, 2008

Interesting...

Taken from my 12/31/07 myspace blog:

"The birth of my third son is supposed to be a good sign. My grandma told me Christmas Day that my third boy will mean that I'll have "Three Kings", my very own little magi! My three boys are supposed to bring me closer to God."

I told you it was interesting. God works in mysterious ways doesn't He? My third son definitely brought me closer to God. This has made me whole-heartedly believe that Ethan's passing was part of God's plan. It made me stop thinking about whether or not there were other possibilities. Although I've never been angry with God for Ethan's passing, my faith has confused me in the past few weeks. Sometimes I wasn't sure if I believed what I believed in. Does that make sense? I suppose this stems back to the fact that I've been approached by people from other faiths. Their theories on death had me question my own.

After I finished reading the excerpt from my blog, I instantly felt better about what I believe in. I feel terrible that I even started to question myself in the first place. Ethan received the sacraments of Baptism and Confirmation before he passed. He did not go to "limbo". I spoke with two seperate priests from two seperate parishes who assured me that Ethan would be "allowed" into heaven despite the fact that he was born out of wedlock. Why would he punished for my sins? My God is a loving God and my son is in heaven with Him. Ethan was always meant to be in heaven with God. That was the plan from the moment he was conceived. It was written in my very own words...

"My three boys are supposed to bring me closer to God."

That's exactly what happened. Ethan made my "three" possible.

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